Mexico City, January 10, 2023.- The School of Nursing of the Faculty of Health Sciences held the presentation Like water between the fingersa book written by alumni María Fernanda Talayero García, with which she seeks to "give hope to people who are going through difficulties that destabilize their lives".
Fernanda Talayero
Fernanda explains that she began writing this work approximately 12 years ago. "Cómo agua entre los dedos has been a reminder of great moments in my life, starting with those extraordinary moments as a nurse and the experiences of going through the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit not only as a nurse, but also as a mother," she says.
In addition, she says that in the book readers "will find a process that began a few months ago, where I managed to stay alive despite the critical nature of the event. I have lived a struggle with myself, learning to be heard by myself, first of all, and secondly in my environment, without fear or fear of being judged, criticized or minimized".
A unique opportunity
One of Fer's biggest dreams, when she became a nurse, was always to be able to help make a difference in her profession, but when she found herself involved in various health problems, her plans changed: "I wanted so much to make a difference. However, as time went by, that dream faded and I began to live other dreams," she says.
In May 2022, she found herself as a patient in intensive care and tells us that the need to express herself became greater and greater. So she took her phone and began to write about her experiences, what she was feeling and living at that moment.
"Thanks to this I was able to have an escape valve, I decided it was time to take the bull by the horns and give closure to everything I had been carrying and suffering for years. That motivated me to see my life with different eyes, to wake up and recognize myself as Fer Talayero," he says.
UP Nurse
Fer has fond memories of her time at Panamericana: "I remember UP as my home, where I lived so many moments, so many experiences and so many stories that helped me become the great nurse I am today," she says.
She points out that it was precisely the training she received at our university that gave rise to her professional growth and led her to become head of the Neonatal Intensive Care and Physiological Nursery at the Hospital Español.
"I was able to make changes within my trench, spreading that love for my profession, teaching the importance of keeping up to date in all aspects for the patients and their families," she recalls.
He also adds: "At the UP I was taught that the patient comes first, empathy is fundamental and theoretical knowledge will provide the weapons to be at the forefront of a reality that surpasses us".
Transforming pain into value
Due to his illness, Fer has had to face experiences that in recent months have taught him to turn pain into courage: "I consider that this process of transformation is a huge job, because it starts with knowing and accepting oneself".
"I made pain an ally and learned to manage it with the help of various relaxation and breathing techniques. However, the secret was to know my body perfectly and listen to what it was asking for," she adds.
She also states that another important point is to realize that your pain is suffered by the person who accompanies you: "Sometimes we forget how difficult it is to see the person you love in pain. It is important to establish a communication channel to be able to express what is experienced on both sides. That way we will be aware of each other's pain".
From "why me" to "what for me".
Fer explains that she has had to deal with illnesses for 15 years, since she was diagnosed with Lupus. She explains that for years she has gone through all the stages of grief: denial, going, negotiation, depression and acceptance.
"I was angry and depressed for a long time. I managed to distract myself occasionally, however, these emotions kept reappearing like ghosts, because I didn't resolve and ignored everything that bothered me or made me feel bad. It didn't bring anything to a conclusion and only made the snowball bigger," she says.
"I had to understand that I am more than a disease or a symptom, it was necessary to accept myself 100% and give me the courage just to be me. Obviously I didn't get there alone, I needed many hours of therapy and many hours with myself", she assures.
To this she adds: "When I found myself as a completely different woman from years ago, I had the courage to take the bull by the horns and face my reality: I am a complete woman, who loves, who cries, who knows how to keep silent and listen, who is a wife and mother, who is happy".
That's how, she says, she realized that she had been asking the wrong question for years, because she didn't need to know "why", but to find the "what for": "The reason for being, the motive (...) Suddenly I discovered that those 'what for' come and go, they grow and become stronger, every day I have new motives. I think you find strength when you have the courage to accept yourself 100%", she reveals.
A legacy for future generations
Today Fer Talayero defines herself as a woman who works every day to constantly rediscover herself and avoid meaningless anguish: "I am a writer, a wife, a mother full of love, but above all a happy woman". She would also like to be remembered as "a tenacious woman who, regardless of the circumstances, follows her goals".
Additionally, for Panamericana students, he has a message: "Remember that, regardless of what you are studying, each of the careers have a common factor: contact with more people".
"Be human, listen. Always keep alive that first reason why you decided to study, which is generally to help, defend or care for another human being (...) Be truly human, live empathy and give the opportunity to start that revolution of humanizing our lives," he concludes.
